Monday, October 26, 2009

HE Provides!!!

So, it's been a few days since I've blogged! Not because I have forgotten that I have a blog, but because I want to blog when I feel that God would have me to!! I believe that God led me to start this blog for a reason, so I want to be sensitive to His guiding, and try to blog only when He wants me to!! Only when He has something to say, and not just Lori!

Father, I pray that this blog will be a vessel for you!! I pray Lord that I will only write what you have put in my heart, not a letter or a word more!! Whatever brings you the most glory!!!

If anyone has been around me, at all, the last few months, you have probably heard me talking about our money being tight or me being broke!! I don't think I would call it whining, just being very honest about our present situation!! (I'm probably too honest some times, because really everyone doesn't need to know or want to know all of my business!!!) But nonetheless, you've probably heard me allude to it!!! Between me going part-time, being off for 12 weeks (pretty much without pay), the adoption costs, just regular costs of having a newborn, regular pediatrician appointments, and then specialty doctor appointments, not to mention our regular bills, and some home problems, our banking account has significantly dwindled!! There have been weeks where I had no idea where the money was going to come from!! A little side note here: there are major issues going on with our house right now like some leaking, INTO THE LIVING ROOM, and basement, all because of clogged gutters and rotten boards!! Here's the part I want you to catch...God knew where every single penny was going to come from and He provided it, EXACTLY when we needed it!! Not one single, solitary bill/note has been missed or late!! We have had food on our table (whether I cooked it or Ronald did), the baby has had diapers and formula everytime he needed them, the dogs have even had food when they needed it, the power has stayed on, the car has had gas, the water has continued to run, the phone continues to ring, (sometimes, to my dismay) etc...I could go on and on!!! Get this little detail!! We received a good chunk of money and A LOT of gift cards at our baby showers! I used a gift card every week, up until the week AFTER I started back to work!! And then after the gift cards were gone, we received money for our birthdays or late baby presents,(basically diapers or more gift cards!) Belated birthday presents that came at just the right time!! Brad's sweet Granny gives us formula every time we see her! Just today she gave me 2 cans of Isomil! Also, we received a check in the mail for $1000.00 for an escrow reimbursement from where we closed on our house almost 3 years ago!!! See what I am getting at!! God has continually provided for us! If you are a child of the King's you really can trust Him AND His word! You don't have to worry about where the money is going to come from, because God knows and has known since before the world was created!! Think of the endless number of hours that we have spent worrying about money, how bills are going to get paid, how we're going to buy the kids new shoes, how are we going to fix the leaks in our house, how will we afford gas for the car, or food for the table? What if every time we find ourselves worrying about money, we make an effort in our minds to say, "Not, how are we going to pay for this or that...., but Thank you Lord for already providing for us!!!" I pray Lord that we always remember that we can trust you and your Holy Word!! I pray Lord that if we are trying to carry our own financial burdens, Lord, that we will confess that to You, and we know Lord, that because of what your word says, that You will give us a peace that passes all understanding and You WILL provide for us!!

Matthew 6:28-33
"And why do you worry about clothes? See how the lillies of the field grow. They do not labor or spin. Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you, O you of little faith? So do not worry, saying, 'What shall we eat?' or 'What shall we drink' or 'What shall we wear?' For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well."

I have prayed diligently about getting the gutters fixed, so that there will be no more leaking IN our house!! I have tried to figure out a way MYSELF to pay for the gutters to be fixed! But, every time I pray I get the answer, "Not right now. Trust me!" You may be thinking, "Wow, she's crazy! It's JUST gutters and besides that, their causing leaks IN to her house." I know it sounds kinda funny, but I believe that God is trying to teach me to trust him with EVERYTHING!!! He's not blind-sighted by the fact that my house leaks!! He wants me to trust that He will take care of me, in all things!!!!

So, I am listening closely for His sweet voice and waiting patiently for what's next! I do hope that we won't have to buy umbrellas so we can sit in our living room, but then again, if we do, I am sure that God will provide those too!!

He's in the details!!

Not our time, but His perfect timing!!!

Friday, October 16, 2009

I Remembered!!!

So, I remembered that I started a blog!! Whoo to the Hoo!!! I think that I'm really gonna like this blogging!!!
I thought maybe for today I would post a list of 25 things that you may or may not know about me. I can't be on here long, I must nap while Andrew naps today!! I have to re-energize, physically and mentally, so that I can take care of the babies at work tonight!! So, on with the list.....

1. I love being a mom. I would love, even more, to be a stay-at-home mom! I know the desire is from God, so I must wait patiently for it to happen!!
2. HATE TO COOK! I cannot emphasize this enough! But, probably need to learn a little more about cooking, especially if I'm gonna be a SAH mom! :)
3. I am NOT a morning person. So, if we chat before 10AM and I can't seem to remember it later, don't get mad. I am just NOT a morning person! Just ask Brad!
4. I am NOT a phone person!! Period!! No home, cell, or I, phones at all!! Not a fan!!
5. I love me some Alabama Football!! Love, Love, Love
6. I love my church! It is a wonderful place to worship! We're small, but there's a LOT of love that circulates throughout the people there!
7. Sometimes, I screen my phone calls. Refer back to #4.
8. Unfortunately, I try to make things happen for me, instead of waiting on God! Like right now, I am trying my hardest to figure out a way for me to stay at home. All the while God is saying, "Trust Me! I'm in the details!!" I am so much like Sarah! Sarah wanted a baby so bad that she allowed her servant Hagar to be with her husband, basically, in order to speed up the baby process. God had already promised Sarah a baby, but she took matters into her own hands! We must remember, GOD IS IN THE DETAILS!!!
9. Love jewelry!! My Christmas list usually has jewelry listed in at least 3 or 4 different spots. Just in case!!
10. I used to play the clarinet...ish! I'm not sure if you really called what I did, "playing," but I did carry a clarinet and march around the field!
11. I was in the Million Dollar Band!! That's where I met Brad!! Sweet thing!!!
12. I went to Auburn for 3 months, right out of high school!! HATED IT!! (Not sure HATE is a strong enough word, but its all I've got right now). Still to this day, I get a knot in my stomach when we go to Auburn for a game or to visit with family!! So, unfortunately, Tiger fans, I can truly say that "I HATE AUBURN!"
13. I have 2 older brothers!! They're great! I have a wonderful family!! Very blessed!!
14. I love pickles!! I even have a pickle ornament on my Christmas tree every year! My mouth is watering as I type this!!!
15. I told Brad that he had sexy legs and that was all she wrote!! And that dear friends, is how you do it!!!
16. I confess that I love the show "The Suite Life on Deck" on the Disney channel!! That's okay right?
17. Not a fan of teeth or feet!! Something about the double ee's! Not sure!
18. I long to feel accepted within my Christian friends! What? Am I like in 7th grade?
19. I love Christmas music!! I love it in December AND in July. Thank you Magic 96.5!
20. I know God put me with Brad, so that I could learn how to be more self-less!! He really, really is very self-less!!!
21. I tried to mess up God's plan for me and Brad. I think I broke up with him like a million times before we got married!! Luckily, God's in control and NOT Lori!! (Really don't deserve Brad!)
22. I loved that we were able to adopt!! I hope we can again, real soon!!
23. I love to hear Andrew talking in the morning when he first gets up! The sweetest sound I've ever heard!!
24. I've always had low self-esteem!! It drives me crazy, because I know how God views me! And my husband, seemingly, adores me! At our premarital counseling, he told me that he wishes I could see me, like he sees me! Love him!! Did I mention, how I DO NOT deserve him!!
25. I have lots of times that I gripe and moan, but ultimately, I love my life!! I am truly blessed!!!


Thursday, October 15, 2009

I'm a Blogger!!!

So, honestly, do I think that my life is sooo interesting, that I need to write down the details of everyday living in the life of Lori? The answer is....that is a definite negative!!! But, sometimes, I have so much going on in my mind, that I just need to write it out. So, this is probably more for me than you! Will people actually follow my ramblings? Doubtful! (That kinda sounded like, I am going to start a cult!!) But, at least I can ease my mind, without having to pick up a pen and notebook!!! Anyway, you will find, IF you choose to follow this blog, that I write like I talk!! I am sooooo random at times....most times!! So, I apologize in advance, for the blog not flowing! You may have trouble following the ramblings! But, that's how I am and I am giving you plenty of warning!!

Now, to what is on my heart! I must admit that I am actually getting paid to type this right now! I am actually on-call!! And it is 1:47 in the AM!! Too bad, it's only $1.50 an hour!! Nonetheless, making money to create a blog!!!The joys of being a nurse!!! But, I am really glad that God has allowed this time for me to sit and reflect!! I was able to spend some wonderful one on one time with the Creator of the Universe!! Isn't it funny how we can in our selfish minds think things like, "Great, I'm on-call tonight, so I must stay up for most of the night waiting to see if I'll be called in to work. Really, wish I could go to bed." All the while, God is saying, "Now, we can have some needed alone time." Thank you Father for allowing me to enter into Your presence!! Thank you Father for drawing me to you! Forgive me Lord, that I don't take advantage of all the times that You have called me into your presence! I have missed so many blessings!!

The last year of my life has been a roller coaster, but it has been the absolute BEST year of my life!! God has truly been at work in my life and I am so thankful that He chose me to live this particular life!! For those of you who aren't familiar with the details of our journey, here is a brief synopsis: I married Brad in 2004. By January of 2005, WE had decided that we were okay with the idea of having babies..I do stress the WE part!! And so our journey begins!!! I could tell you every single detail about our journey and maybe, if that's what God wants me to do, I just might, but for now, know that we started a journey into the infertility world, also known as "The Trial that Truly Changed Us!!!" Imagine that, God using something like infertility to make you into the person that He wants you to be and knows you can be!! Thank you God that you work everything out for the good of those who love you. After 4 1/2 years of God holding us "in the fire," aka, "The Trial that Truly Changed Us," He saw it fit for us to become the parents of an amazing little boy named Andrew! I am so amazed at God's goodness!! It's so wild to think about how I could have missed out on this blessing, because I was so caught up in what I wanted, when I wanted it!! I was so selfish and questioned God soooo many times over the course of the 4 1/2 years!! I am ashamed to think of all the times I asked God, "Why?" Why God, did I miscarry my babies? Why Lord, does she get to be pregnant again, and I can't get pregnant at all? Why God, did you even let me see that baby and buy her clothes and prepare my home for her, if you knew that her mom wouldn't sign the papers for us to adopt her?

He could have given in to my rantings and moanings and given me children when I wanted them, and trust me I begged Him for them, but then I wouldn't have received His best, which was Andrew. Thank you Lord for having plans for me and my family! Thank you Lord, for not allowing me to mess up your perfect plan!!

You know, God is in the details! It's a simple statement, but sometimes it is so hard to convince yourself of it! He knew the EXACT time that I would become a mom! He knew the EXACT baby that was going to be mine! I have to trust that He is in the details! It's so easy to say that you know He's in the details...Sometimes, it's just so stinkin' hard to believe it in your heart, when you want, what you want, when you want it! Let's not miss out on all of His best blessings for us, because WE are "tangled up" in the details!!

I guess I'll call the hospital and see if its okay to go to bed! I wonder if I will remember that I have started a blog!! I hope so!!